It’s a lady’s world, but it’s a different world entirely for single mums – emotional cravings, bottled-up sexual urges and burdened mind.
Life happens. Husbands abandon their families. Lawyers put couples asunder. A girl-child gets pregnant out of wedlock. Death strikes and turns the woman into a helpless widow. Surrogacy is the new COVID.
According to Gallup World Poll, Sub-Saharan Africa has the highest percentage of single mothers worldwide, at 32 percent.
Entrepreneurship is a lonely journey. Sometimes, a loving spouse can be the best emotional partner you can have as a business person. Not having anyone to rant to can be frustrating. You either find yourself talking to yourself unconsciously or to your innocent child.
Building a business as a single mum is like living like an orphan. Severally, you will cry, pat yourself on the back and move on. You need an emotional partner to stand by you and reassure you that you are not alone.
Motherhood, just like entrepreneurship, is not a 9 -5 job. Single parents are nearly often working parents and this may mean a parent who is more away than at home. Motherhood is hard. Entrepreneurship is not for the fainthearted. Combining both is like solving Chinese Mathematics. But this is the reality single mums live in for the rest of their lives.
Entrepreneurship is harder for the powerless. Living as a single mum is akin to living without a defense. Combining both makes you much more vulnerable.
Social Service Statistics says that single mums are five times more likely to be poor than married couples. Raising a child alone will drain your purse. Building a business alongside is financially demanding.
While you are making plans to restock your inventories, your child suddenly falls sick. Your profit or part of your capital will be spent on medical bills. You carry the financial burden of a father, mother and an entrepreneur.
Unending bills with no financial support can be a nightmare experience. This is the silent battle that single mums fight daily.
Knowing that you are neither living your best life nor giving your child the best life nor satisfied with the growth of your business can affect your mental health negatively. Sometimes, you may slide into depression and regret. Being a single mum can be psychologically stressful.
Nevertheless, being a single mum is not a setback. Interestingly, the skills you will need to cope as a single mum are the same skills you will need as an entrepreneur – multitasking, creativity, problem-solving, time management, and money management.
Although there are no magical solutions to the travails of mompreneurs, there are proven tips that can be valuable for single mums who want to build successful businesses.
1. Take responsibility
If you are waiting for someone to pity you, then you are not ready to succeed. No one will share the responsibility with you. Stand up and take full responsibility for your life. After all, life happens to us all in different ways and proportions.
You won’t get it right from the onset. The key word is to start…today. You’ve cried and complained enough. The status of a single mum is a new normal that you have to live with courage.
2. Draw strength
To stay focused and motivated, you must draw strength from the inside of you. To stay motivated, keep a record of your little accomplishments.
3. Market your business shamelessly
Your business is your main source of livelihood. Be shameless about it. Open your mouth and market your business. Write about it. Talk about it. When you introduce yourself, briefly talk about your business.
If possible, carry some samples of your products around. Have well-designed business cards or flyers that you give to people. Don’t let anyone shame you for marketing your product.
4. Look for role models and support groups
Your life is a product of the contributions of other people. Many single mums have successfully built businesses. Their journey and progress can inspire you.
Join support groups and communities of single mums and widows and draw insights from collaborative learning. Your problem is not peculiar to you alone. Don’t build your business in isolation.
5. Be productive
The key to success as a mompreneur is not just a mindset shift, but also hardwork. Bills will not stop coming because you are a single mum. Expenses do not discriminate. Therefore, you should only be involved in productive activities that will increase the value of our business.
Read books. Watch YouTube videos. Take online courses. Attend and organize training. Acquire high-demand skills. Acquire another degree. Apply for grants and loans. Never be caught idle.
6. Be organized
If you do not have a to-do list, you will most likely be overwhelmed with the tasks. Consider your daily tasks and prioritize them according to importance. Your life, your child, and your business should come first.
7. Be smart with money
Whether you are a full-time business owner or you have your business as a side hustle, always remember that you are the breadwinner of the family – the only source of income.
This is not the time to lavish money on every aso-ebi and the latest iPhone. Learn to manage money. Build an emergency fund. Invest in yourself. Invest in your business. Invest in your child.
8. Your mental health matters
Building a business requires significant amount of mental energy. Therefore, you need to prioritize and protect your mental health so that you don’t slide into depression or bitterness. When life gets overwhelming, learn to take some rest, take time off, see a therapist or counsellor.
9. Prioritize your family
Make your child a part of your entrepreneurial journey. Put your child before a man. Your relationship with a man may end, but your relationship with your family is eternal. At the end of the day, your child will be the only one left – a solace and comfort in your life.
When everyone turns their back on you, your family will still be there. Your husband’s family may show pseudo-interest in you primarily because you have their child. But your own family will always stand by you through thick and thin. They are more likely to babysit your child occasionally while you away doing business.
These are alternative emotional partners on whose shoulders you can lean and cry whenever you feel down. Why languish in loneliness when you have a family who is ever-ready to give you listening ears? Don’t also forget trustworthy friends who stick more like families.
10. Your integrity is your defense
Build integrity. It will save you when you least expect it. Be a woman of your word. Deliver on your promises to your customers. Pay your suppliers. Pay back your loan; your integrity is an investment. A good name is as important as silver and gold.
11. Do whatever makes you happy
If you can afford to buy a car, build your house, or go on vacation don’t hesitate. You are not immune to enjoyment.
Learn to celebrate your small wins. Have a budget for fun. You worked for your money, so enjoy your money. You deserve a soft life too.
If getting married again will make you happier, be open to love.
Your happiness is your responsibility. Nobody else will make you feel good about yourself. You can live your dream life as a single mum.